If you buy a game box that includes both checkers and chess, the 8-year-old will undoubtedly want to play chess, despite the fact that you know it’s too difficult for him and he’d have a much better time playing checkers. Why would anybody want anything to do with a round piece-of-shit chip when, in the other game, you get to fuck around with knights and kings?
I’ve never been good at chess until I played an 8-year-old.
Despite how many times you explain how a knight moves, he will insist on moving it in every other goddamn shape except for an L.
He would rather sacrifice any other piece on the board–including his king–for the precious life of one of his pawns.
Every single time one of his pawns die, it will feel like the end of the world.
He refuses to call the queen a “queen”, but instead “the mother”.
When preparing for a game, he will inevitably point at me and shout, “I’m gonna kill your mother!”
