Tag Archives: jobs

Dear Writer

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You are not special.

You do not deserve leniency.

You are an employee of the mind. You wanted to work, well here’s your chance to work. Now work.

You are no different than the kid who flips burgers at McDonald’s.

You are the garbage man outside your house.

You are the person scraping road kill off the side of the highway.

You do not get a speed-pass to skip ahead in line. There is nothing remarkable about you that differentiates you from any other soul out there trying to make a dollar.

You are a person with a job to do. You either do your job, or you’re fired. You sit around, fucking off, complaining about your job enough, then we’ll just find someone else to do it.

You don’t feel like writing? Too bad. Do you think the waitress feels like busting her ass off, listening to your problems, only for a two dollar tip? No, but she does it anyway. Why? Because she has a job to do. She wants to get paid. Your worries are pathetic in her eyes. She doesn’t sit around and wait for something to inspire her to refill your coffee.

Every second you aren’t writing is another second you’re wasting on the clock. What are you even doing here?

You may not have a spatula or a box cutter, but you do have a pen, you do have a keyboard. Your tools may be different, but it doesn’t change the fact that your shift isn’t even close to over.

Dear writer, either piss off or do your fucking job.

Updates (01/21/12)

First, in case you missed it, I got the pleasure to interview Cracked.com columnist, John Cheese, on the DMD blog a few weeks back. If you haven’t been following his column, then you’re truly missing out. Click here for the interview.

Secondly, I am currently editing an upcoming anthology for Dark Moon Books called Zombie Jesus and Other True Stories. The theme is alternate history horror, and yes, it is a paying market ($20 and a contributor’s copy). Click here for the rest of the information. It will be the first of three planned anthologies of 2012 that I will be editing along with writers Stan Swanson and Lori Michelle. Calls for submissions for the other two will be announced soon.

I’ve been working on writing The Ultimate Survival for Humanity: How To Survive Attacks From Zombies, Vampires, Ex-Lovers & Other Scary Things as of late, and it is coming together nicely. In case you have no idea what I’m talking about, this is a book I am co-authoring with Stan Swanson that will surely rock your socks off; it is scheduled to be published Summer 2012 by Dark Moon Books, so I am really kicking my ass to get this finished. Not to mention that at the moment I am also in the middle of writing a novel (about 25,000 words in it so far), a graphic novel, and a book of flash fiction. And other projects as they come up, I’m sure.

Hopefully the writing doesn’t get put too much on the backburner seeing as I was just hired full-time over at everyone’s favorite store, Walmart, as an overnight stocker. I doubt it does; actually, I think it will probably get me writing even more. It seems that the more free time someone has, the less productive they end up being. So this will be a good thing all around (especially the whole actually having money factor).

2012 is looking like a great year for writing, too. I already have three accepted tales so far, and that’s half of the number of acceptances I got last year, so yeah, things are definitely looking up. The three accepted tales being in the upcoming Dark Moon Digest Issue Number 7, an unnamed horror western anthology edited by Eric S. Brown, and the charity flash fiction book, Slices of Flesh, which also will be featuring perhaps one of the best horror writers in the game today, Jack Ketchum.

So that’s what’s going on there.

Now to end this post on a creepy note.

Today myself and the aforementioned Lori Michelle were visiting a flea market. Nothing unusual about that, people visit flea markets all the time, right? Of course they do. I even managed to get a sweet ass 1941 first printing of a Robert Louis Stevenson collection.

 

 

But then we found the heads.

The baby heads.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sweet screams.